For God's sake.

I am pissed off.

'Why?' I hear you cry?

Because people think that they have just discovered Robert Pattinson. They think they've plucked him from the pack of 'nobodies' and put him in a pile of 'somebodies'.

Ahem, ex-bloody-cuse me?

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire? Ring a bell? Cedric Diggory? Ring a better bell? Isatou's obsession with Robert Pattinson circa 2006? RING ANY BELLS?

I saw him first, America. I noted the handsome features, the tall physique, the amazing gravity-defying hair. Oh my actual god.

So, Twilight's come along and is supposedly going to be bigger than Harry Potter [well, it'll be better for our Rob, anyway...] Robbie the Hottie's been casted as the lead... some tarty vampire named Edward Cullen.

Well fabulous. Just when I thought I'd spotted talent and made it a goal to seduce him back to my cave, he becomes a member of 'Young Hollywood'.

Nice one Robbie the Hottie. You've ruined your chances with me. Hmpff.

Actually, you've most likely enhanced them, you dirty dirty beast ;)

Say it with me now... Hotttttie ♥

I am not conforming. I am not conforming. I am not conforming. I am not conforming. I am not conforming. I am not conforming. I am not conforming. I am not conforming.

I am not the moth, I am indeed the flame.

I started this trend, bitches.